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My Story

“I don’t know when my parents began their war against each other – but I do know the only prisoners they took were their children.” Tom Wingo- Prince of Tides

My parents married when my Dad was 33 and my Mom was 18.  They were married in 1963 and divorced in 1968. It was a devastating marriage; multiple moves, affairs by both parents and full of verbal and physical violence.  Then the savagery of divorce.  We’d be at our grandmother’s house and our Dad would come get us and take us.  We’d be at the other grandmother’s house and my mom would come get us and take us.  We were kidnapped twice by one of our parents.  There were accusations of judges being bribed and paperwork being filed years after the rulings and an article written in a major Texas newspaper about the divorce and custody battle.  My parents hated each other and at times it felt like they hated each other more than they loved us.  This war between them lasted well into my brother’s and my adult lives.  My brother had to tell them how they were expected to behave at his wedding.  At my Master’s Degree graduation ceremony, I had one friend monitor my Dad and the other friend monitor my Mom.  My parents were told not to speak.  For years I have heard one of my parents constantly degrade my other parent.  Even after the death of the other parent, they have continued.

I know that, as a child of divorce, conflict and litigation only takes prisoners and leaves a scorched earth.  Healing from those wounds can take years to overcome; for adults and children alike.  Collaborative Law offers you the opportunity to be in control of your future.  It allows co-parents the opportunity to create a future parenting plan.   It offers us a new way of ending our relationships AND it offers us the opportunity to create a new way of communicating, a new way of being parents.  It also allows us to honor and respect ourselves at our core…and the other person as a human being.

Brenda Lee Roberts M. Ed., LPC


One Response to “My Story”

  1. Elizabeth says:

    Thank you for sharing your story. There is no question about your passion for wanting to help families avoid the destruction of divorce.Clearly you understand the pain of prolonged conflict and have dedicated your practice to minimizing conflict for families.